Hi Valerie,
I don't know if you remember us, we were stabled right down from you, and Laine, being the WONDERFUL girl she is, loaned missy her saddle for X/C for the weekend, when she needed it. This at Ocala in the fall, at the Trainng 3 day. Nidus was her horse.
I want to share some stuff with you, and I hope, during this time, knowing, you aren't alone, helps.
My son, now 21 was born very sick, with MANY, MANY disabilities. I was told he would never "walk, talk, feed himself, see, or hear or function at anything near normal". I was asked to put him in a home, and "forget" I had him.
I know you must think these are nothing alike. But our babies, well they are "OUR" babies. I stood for months by his bedside, willing him to live, to eat, to breath. I willed him to be okay, and to walk, and talk, and be a human. They would tie him down, so he couldn't pull out tubes, and I would sob, because I couldn't explain to my precious baby why he had to endure so much. I KNOW you are going through a lot of those emotions, and I pray each day for God to stand beside you, and hold your hand, as you hold Laine's.
She is a wonderful girl. So giving and loving. I know right now it is hard, each day brings something difficult, and even the smallest things become so hard to deal with. Just keep all of our prayers in your heart, and when it gets really hard, go ahead and cry. Because guess what..it does help. And remember to smile, and laugh at the slightest thing, because it is THOSE things that will get you through. Take it in small steps, and don't wonder what tomorrow will bring. Face each minute as it comes.
As for Frodo...I am truly saddened. And I know this is something you have probably heard a DOZEN zillion times, but that horse loved his job. HE LOVED IT. They don't get there without loving it. And he was doing what he loved when he got injured. There are many horses out there who never get the love and attention he got, who never got to dream the big dream. HE did, and I bet if you could have asked him...he would have nickered and said, yes, mom, if I gotta go, let me go at the top....
As for telling her, I know someday MIssy's big horse will die, and I dunno how I will handle that...she has had him forever you see. But I will for sure pray...and for sure think of you every day. Missy sends her love to both of you. And says that your daughter is an idol to her. Not just for her ability, but because she is so nice, and caring about others.
About my son....he is now applying to Texas A&M for Aerospace Engineering. My baby, who may never walk, talk, or eat, can't shut up, won't stop eating, and well, he walks slow, but only cause he is lazy...grin.
Take care, and if you need ANYTHING....let me know.
Love,
Dee McMaster
